Champagne Dares
by noctepanther
Summary: Pit/Samus. Rated for mainly for language.


_Nocte's Note: I own nothing but the writing and awesome hair. _

Pit tugged at the tie around his neck, fighting the urge to be dramatic and make it look as if he was hanging himself. The angel sighed and leaned against the wall. He had to show some maturity, after all, to prove that he wasn't as young as he looked.

He hated these publicity parties. Just because there was a new season of Smash everybody thought it was a good reason to get dressed up and then get smashed. He wanted to be back in his tunic and in his room. Instead, he was wearing a tux that clung too tight to his body and listening to music that was too loud and too annoying. No one else seemed to mind it, though. Snake and Falcon were in the center of the floor, grinding in time the music against some girls they had found somewhere. _'Probably on the streets,_' the angel thought. The Smasher girls were off in a corner, probably gossiping. _'Not that I can see Samus doing that kind of shit.' _He chuckled to himself at the thought of a gossiping Samus. Pit couldn't see where the others were, but was assured that they were have a better time than he was.

"…Twice in one night." Pit's ears perked up at Ike's familiar voice. He started towards the direction it came from.

"No way. No. Fucking. Way."

"Evena Peach doesn't put outa that much."

"I'm telling you, it's true." It was a small group of the male fighters, deep in conversation.

Luigi straightened. "I'ma just saying I don'ta believe you."

Ganondorf nodded. "I'm inclined to … agree with Luigi. There's just no way that you fucked her twice that night, let alone at all, without losing your balls."

"Who?" Four heads turned towards Pit. "Who are you who talking about?" he asked again.

"Don't bother yourself with it, kid." Ash, the Pokemon Trainer, smirked as he ruffled Pit's oak-colored hair. "We'll tell you in a couple of years."

"I'm older than you," Pit countered. "Why does age even matter? I wanted to know _who_ you were talking about."

"Well, when it comes to this person, experience matters," Ike said, "And you're much too inexperienced. I mean, there's a reason you wear a white toga."

"What do you mea…?" Pit's voice trailed off as he realized what they were saying. "You're kidding, right? Have you seen my Goddess?! I'm not that innocent."

"Whatever you say, kid," Ash said, rolling his eyes. "I bet you've never even kissed a girl."

"That's not true! I've kissed plenty of girls. Probably more than you lot. Fuck, all you do is make out with your Squirtle." Ganondorf snorted at Pit's comment while the other three recovered from the shock of hearing an angel say "fuck."

"Is that so?" Ash glared at Pit. "Then why don't you go kiss one of the girls?" He jerked in his head towards Samus and Zelda. Peach had gone to dance with Mario. "No. I've got a better idea. Why don't you go kiss Samus? I mean, if you're as good as you say, she'll probably let you keep your nuts."

Pit and Ash locked eyes for a few seconds. "Fine," Pit said. He turned on his heel and started over to where Zelda and Samus were sitting.

'_Shit shit shit shit shit and double shit.'_ He thought on his way across the dance floor. _'Why did I say yes? I don't have anything to prove to those guys. I already know that I'm better than them. Hell, I just wiped the floor clean with Ash during the promo battle. And why did I just think such a cliché line?' _Samus was getting closer and closer. Pit forced his eyes to look at the ground instead of the black dress that clung to every curve of her body. _'Damn, she looks good without that suit on. Of course, she looks good with the suit on. She just looks good no matter what, doesn't she? Fuck, I hope she can't read minds. She's got Chozo DNA in her, right? That hasn't given her some kind of psychic powers, has it? 'Cause she would kill in me a second if she knew I thought she was cute.'_ Pit almost stopped walking. He had just called Samus Aran, the most feared bounty hunter in the galaxy, "cute." _'Yup. She would definitely kill me for that.'_

"Hi, Pit." Zelda's voice brought up back to attention. He was standing in front of Zelda and Samus. _'When did I get here?'_ "How are you?"

"I-I'm good. Zelda. You're Zelda. I'm good. How're you? Hi, Samus." he stammered. The tall blonde gave a grunt of acknowledgement without looking at him. Zelda glared at her and elbowed her roughly in the side.

"Hey." Her response was curt and her voice was strong – Pit liked that. Peach had that insanely high voice that only dogs and Mario could truly understand, and Zelda spoke in a very formal tone, which wasn't her fault since she was a princess. Still, Pit always found himself enjoying Samus' voice when she chose to talk. It was rough and almost scary. _'Fuck, everything about her scares me shitless. Why the fuck do I like that?' _

"I'm fine, Pit, thank you for asking." Zelda answered his original question. "And I would love to stay and chat, but I need to go get some more…punch." She threw a quick look at Samus before heading away towards a long table filled with food and drink.

"What's that about? Her drink is full," Pit asked.

"Hell if I know." Samus sighed, "She always does weird shit like that. She's probably horny and wanted an excuse to go jump Link." She sat down and started to drum her fingers against her thigh.

Pit blinked. With her sitting, he was a little taller than her and had to look down to see her face. He could see her bra strap sneaking out from under her dress. He could see a thin scar that ran from her neck down to her breasts. He took an unconscious sharp breath.

"You okay?" she asked, looking up at him. There was another scar, going from her earlobe to the base of her neck.

Pit blinked a couple of times, vainly trying to regain his composure. "I..I'm fine. Kind of hot," Samus gave a grunt of agreement. "But I'm good." Silence crept between the two again as Samus turned her gaze towards the DJ and Pit fought from returning his gaze to her breasts.

"Um…Samus…" he started.

"What?" She looked up again, her pretty face furrowed in annoyance. He hoped it was because of the party and not because of him.

Still, he had to act fast, if he wanted to live. Cupping her face, he brought her lips to his. Knowing that this element of surprise added about fifteen seconds to his lifespan, he did everything in his power to make it memorable. He deepened the kiss, ran his tongue across her lips, gave them a little nip, and then broke off. They stared at one another for half a beat.

"Nothing. I've gotta go, Samus." He half ran, half flew out of the room.

The group of men across the room watched in amazement as the angel escaped with his life. "Look, she's moving!" Ike whispered excitedly to Ash. He pointed over to Samus, who had risen from her chair and was stalking towards the other doorway.

"I bet she's going to get her blaster." Ash whispered back.

-X-

Zelda was hanging up her dress when she heard someone knocking on her door. "Come in!" she yelled over her shoulder. The door opened and then clicked shut. "Samus! What are you doing here?" The bounty hunter was still in her dress and was holding a bottle of champagne in one hand and a flue in the other. When she didn't answer, Zelda walked to where her friend stood and looked at her face. It wasn't red, and her eyes weren't glassy, so she was either still sober or could hold her liquor. "How about you sit down?" She guided Samus down to the bed and then sat down next to her, looking at her expectantly.

"You have blue eyes," Samus said. Zelda nodded. "You have blue eyes. He has blue eyes, too."

"Who has blue eyes, Samus? Link?" Zelda was mentally running through the list of Smashers and their eye color. "Marth?"

Samus shook her head at both names. "No. They didn't kiss me. Zel, he kissed me."

Zelda eyed the bottle again. Samus never used shortened names, even with her. "Who kissed you, Sam? Falcon?" Samus snorted. "Snake?" She snorted again.

"Pit."

"Pit? You mean the little angel? He kissed you? Why?"

"I dunno." Samus said, pouring herself another glass. "'Cause he wanted to. 'Cause he thought it would be funny. 'Cause he wants to fuck me." She sipped her drink. "Take your pick."

"Sam, tell me what happened. Every detail."

"You're not gonna turn this into some slumber party shit, are you?"

"Samus, have I ever done girly stuff around you?"

"You wear pink sometimes." Zelda eyes hardened into a glare. Samus sighed. "Fine, point. Touché, whatever."

"I sat down after you left and Pit was staring at me. So I asked him what was wrong. Then the little fucker kissed me. Then he ran away. Little shit." She finished her glass.

Zelda had a quizzical look on her face. "He just left?"

"He just left." Samus repeated. She started to pour herself another glass, but Zelda stopped her. "Should I be doing something right now? Should I be looking for him? I'm good at finding things."

Zelda shook her head. "You should go back to your room and sleep. Find him in the morning and talk to him with a clear head." She stood up and helped Samus off the bed. The bounty hunter started to the door.

"Wait! I almost forgot to ask you something." Samus stopped walking and turned around. Zelda was looking at her with a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. Zelda never had twinkling eyes. "How was it?"

"Like a fuckin' orgasm."

-X-

Breakfast at the Smasher Mansion was always chaotic. Depending on who had kitchen duty, there could be fires in the kitchen, a gourmet meal, or cold pizza. Today, Kirby was turning pancakes and cooking bacon and sausage. Everyone loved when Kirby cooked.

The Smashers had to shout their conversations over the clang of the cookware.

"How'd you sleep last night?"

"I haven't been this hung over in a long time."

"Did you hear what Pit did at the party?"

The angel was sitting at the end of the long table the Smashers ate at, talking to Marth. Marth was the one of the few other contestants whose company Pit enjoyed. Currently, they were debating the merits of using two swords instead of one when talk of Pit and Samus' kiss reached their ears.

Marth arched an eyebrow as he stabbed a piece of sausage on his plate. "Is that true? What Ash is saying?" He jerked his heads towards the Pokemon Trainer.

Pit busied himself with buttering a pancake. "Maybe," he mumbled.

Marth smirked. "That girl is a tough one. I hope you know what you're getting yourself into."

"Of course I do! If I didn't, I would never have kissed her in the first place! I mean, yeah, it was on a dare kind of thing, but that doesn't mean anything."

Marth stopped eating and stared at his friend. "Did you just say 'dare'?"

"Yeah, so what?"

"You kissed Samus Aran. The Hunter. On a dare?" He paused for a second. "Do you have any idea what that means?"

"That Ash might get that stick out of his ass?"

"We could only hope." Marth took a bite of his sausage and swallowed. "Listen, I've known Samus for awhile now, and while she might not call me a friend, I consider her one."

"And that means?"

"That means I know her better than you do. That means that I know if she ever, and I mean ever, found out that you kissed her not because you wanted to, but to prove yourself to a bunch of guys, you will lose everything dear to you. Wings, balls, dick. It's all the same to her."

Pit stopped cutting his pancake for a few seconds, then started again. "I'm sure you're exaggerating."

Marth shrugged and went back to eating. _'Three…two….one..' _

"Shit!"

Marth grinned to himself.

_Nocte's Note: So far, I'm up in the air on this one. I'm happy content wise. I love the idea of Samus and Zelda being good friends and I like a mouthy Pit. Stylistic wise, I'm glad that I worked on my dialogue, but I'm not sure if I struck a good balance between dialogue and description. Review and tell me what you think. _

_I could go for some champagne myself. _

_While writing, I listened to:  
"You Look Good In My Shirt" by Keith Urban. One of the only country songs I like. _


End file.
